


my love is always on your side

by surrenderer



Category: Bandom, Empires
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-28
Updated: 2012-06-28
Packaged: 2017-11-08 19:11:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/446528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/surrenderer/pseuds/surrenderer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes Sean sleeps with his head under his pillow and his blankets pulled all the way up so it looks like there’s no one in bed, and sometimes, he sleeps sprawled out on the mattress, trying to take up as much space as he can. Sometimes, he cuddles with a particular fold of the blankets, or with his pillow, and Tom has photos of all of it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	my love is always on your side

Tom doesn’t do this too often. He doesn’t think that two or three times a week is _that_ often; it’d be a problem if it were, say, every day. But he’s not that creepy, and besides, it’s not like he gets the chance much anyway.

It usually happens when he can’t sleep, or when he wakes up earlier than Sean (unlikely, because even if they’re both early risers, Sean is more of a morning person), because Tom can only do this when Sean is asleep. He doesn’t want Sean to freak out or hate him or something, because Tom really isn’t supposed to do this. He just can’t help it, most of the time.

But when he wakes up before Sean, say, at four in the goddamn morning and can’t get back to sleep, he gets out of bed, goes outside for a smoke, and comes back in. He always hesitates when he gets his camera, because what if Sean wakes up? What if he freaks out and decides to move out of the apartment because Tom’s a bit too creepy for his own good?

(It’s not like Tom doesn’t know he’s creepy. All his friends know it too, they just tend to overlook it or accept it as part of his odd charm.)

Tom always works past the hesitation, though, just like today. And he loops his camera strap around his hand, moving silently through the apartment. He knows which floorboards creak and which don’t, and he carefully steps over the one that creaks right outside of Sean’s bedroom door. Sean always leaves the door slightly ajar, like an invitation, and Tom carefully nudges it open enough that he can creep inside Sean’s room.

Sometimes Sean sleeps with his head under his pillow and his blankets pulled all the way up so it looks like there’s no one in bed, and sometimes, he sleeps sprawled out on the mattress, trying to take up as much space as he can. Sometimes, he cuddles with a particular fold of the blankets, or with his pillow, and Tom has photos of all of it. He has no idea how long it’s been since he started taking pictures of Sean as he sleeps, but he just knows that he has a lot of files on his computer. Too many, honestly, but he just can’t help it. Sean is photogenic, even in his sleep. If anything, he’s even more photogenic when he sleeps. He’s completely relaxed and he’s almost like a little kid, with the tiny smile on his face and his soft mumbles. Tom wishes Sean talked in his sleep, just so he could sit there all night and listen to him.

Tom walks closer to the bed, breathing slowly so he doesn’t wake Sean up. Sean has yet to wake up while Tom is in his room, and the one time he should’ve, he also didn’t. Tom didn’t come back to Sean’s room for weeks after that, too afraid of making the same mistake again. In his defense, that floorboard had never creaked before, not even when Tom put his full weight on it. He doesn’t know why it creaked that night.

Tom creeps around that part of the floor, kneeling down next to Sean’s bed silently. Sean’s face is half-buried in his pillow today, arms stretched out under it and the blankets pulled up to around his chest. His hair is messy, and Tom never touches, but his urge to brush Sean’s hair out of his face is really strong.

The shutter clicks never wake Sean up, but Tom still holds his breath as he takes the first picture of Sean. It’s just a picture of his messy bedhead, and Tom wishes that his camera could capture the sounds and the little movements Sean makes. The soft snores, the little shifts to get comfortable, the weird twist Tom feels in his stomach whenever he watches Sean for too long… Tom has those ingrained in his memory just like his camera has all these pictures of Sean.

If someone were to draw him and Sean right now, Tom has no doubts that there would be little red hearts above his head, because he’s never understood how a person could love someone and think that they’re perfect despite, and maybe because of, their flaws. He’s loved before, yeah, but not like this. But he understands now, because Tom thinks that Sean really is perfect, or at least someone sent to him to make his life better and give him inspiration and all that.

There’s a reason why Tom is so grateful to be in a band with Sean; why he’s so grateful to live with Sean and be surrounded by his sunny presence all the time. Sean is his best friend and his best inspiration. It’s only normal for Tom to want to be around Sean.

Because Tom always suggests the best guitar lines to counter the ones Sean wrote when Sean is looking at him expectantly and waiting for an answer. Because he takes daily walks to take photos of everything around him, and yet his camera is full of pictures of Sean and maybe one picture of their neighborhood. Because he has yet to see the same look of disappointment on Sean’s face that he’s seen on so many other people’s, and it’s Tom’s goal to make sure that Sean never has a reason to look at him like that.

And because when Tom looks at Sean, all he knows is that he wants Sean to love him just as much as he loves Sean.

Tom takes another picture as Sean shifts, his sigh audible even when half his face is pressed into the pillow. Tom resists the urge to brush his fingers through Sean’s hair, trail them down his arms, touch his face… all of that is reserved for the day Sean actually knows how he feels and accepts it.

Usually, when Sean starts getting restless, that’s Tom’s cue to leave. He doesn’t want Sean waking up to see Tom taking pictures of him; that’s a conversation he isn’t ready to have just yet. So when Sean squirms around a bit and wraps the blankets tighter around his body, Tom stands up, wincing a little at how his knees crack. He’s been kneeling at Sean’s side for about ten minutes, and while he’s not old, he’s too old to be spending too much time on his knees, all blowjob jokes aside.

Tom’s almost made it to Sean’s bedroom door when he hears him stirring. Shit. Tom could make a quick escape, or he could hide (which would be even creepier), or he could stay. He’s leaning towards the first option when he hears Sean mumble something under his breath.

Tom looks back at him. Sean is definitely awake; he’s rolled onto his back and looking directly at Tom. “Well?”

“Well, what?” Tom asks, confused. Sean looks exasperated, but fondly so, like when Tom buys the wrong flavor of Pop-tarts or Sean’s least favorite beer that happens to be Tom’s favorite. Sean is never annoyed at Tom for the little things; Tom sometimes even catches Sean eating the damn Pop-tarts or drinking the beer, all while making a face.

“Are you joining me or not?” Tom has no idea what Sean means until Sean scoots over on the bed, making room next to him. There’s just enough blanket for the two of them to share, and Tom is suddenly aware that he’s still in pajamas.

“Uh,” is what he says, quite eloquently, and Sean rolls his eyes again.

“Come on. You can’t be dense _now_ ,” he sighs, patting the space next to him. “Either join me or leave, but it’s fucking four in the morning and I want to sleep, so come on.” Tom stares at Sean again, realizing what he’s offering, and before his mind has made a decision, his feet have already carried him back to Sean. Sean smiles at him, so sleepy and warm and affectionate, and Tom puts the camera down before sliding into bed next to him. For the first time in his life, he’s tamped down the urge to take a picture of Sean, but that’s just because the real thing is so much better.


End file.
